Dreamliner Battery Fires....Shhhhhh Don't report it.....

Dreamliners are still catching fire but today nobody is bothering to report it to you. It is none of your business.

What you don’t know won’t hurt you….. Well it actually will hurt you but at least Boeing (and the FAA) won’t have to listen to your endless whining before the plane you are in plunges to the ground.

Just sit there and look out the window and think happy thoughts. The raging inferno going on beneath your feet is none of your damned business.

http://www.gizmodo.com.au/…/faa-is-doing-nothing-about-con…/

Unreported failures

In October of last year, in an event that no one reported, (WHY REPORT IT….NO NEED FOR CONCERN) a Qatar Airways 787 had to make an emergency diversion. The pilots were alerted to a battery issue during flight. Qatar Airways referred questions to the FAA and NTSB, and declined to say how many travellers were on the plane. The Dreamliners can carry 254 passengers.

The FAA, which was notified of the episode by Boeing, commented on the incident via spokeswoman Laura Brown: “The battery design and enclosure performed as intended by limiting and containing the failure.” (IF IT WAS SUCH A SUCCESS THAN WHY THE EMERGENCY LANDING????…JUST KEEP FLYING. IT IS ALL GOOD.)

Boeing notified the FAA and the NTSB about the emergency landing of Qatar’s 787 under a provision designed to encourage the industry to “share significant safety related information,” NSTB spokesman Peter Knudson said. Neither agency conducted an investigation (WHY INVESTIGATE…..F*CK IT!) into the failure of the Qatar Airways battery, but the FAA allowed Boeing to assess the damage and report the results back to the agency .(LET US KNOW HOW SH*TTY YOUR PLANE IS AFTER YOU LOOK AT THE ASHES….. WE WILL BE LOOKING THE OTHER WAY.)

According to a knowledgeable source, last week a European 787 operator also had a battery release fumes and smoke into the containment box but this person did not identify the airline. (KEEP IT A MYSTERY. PEOPLE LOVE MYSTERIES)

The FAA’s Brown would not confirm any other episodes beyond the one on Qatar Airways. “We don’t consider something an ‘event’ if the containment box performs as designed,” she said.

(AS LONG AS THE RAGING INFERNO STAYS INSIDE THE CONTAINMENT BOX THERE IS NO PROBLEM. IF A TREE FALLS IN THE WOODS AND NOBODY HEARS IT THAN IT DIDN’T HAPPEN. IF A FIRE HAPPENS ON A DREAMLINER BUT NOBODY SEES IT THAN IT ALSO NEVER HAPPENED. NO NEED TO INVESTIGATE. NO NEED TO REPORT IT. IGNORING THE PROBLEM IS ALWAYS THE CORRECT ANSWER. ENJOY YOUR FLIGHT.)

The first battery problems were on these airlines in 2013, (IT WAS MUCH EARLIER THAN 2013. THE FIRST FIRE HAPPENED IN TESTING YEARS EARLIER…..BOEING SAID THEY FIXED IT…..BOEING LIED.) triggering the grounding of the fleet. The plane was only allowed to fly again after Boeing encased the batteries in a stainless steel box to make sure the power source could meet fire protection standards. (PROBLEM SOLVED…FLY ON.)

After 787s were fitted with the battery housing, a Japan Airlines 787 undergoing maintenance at Tokyo’s Narita Airport began emitting smoke (UH OH…..) in January of 2014. Investigators with the Japan Transportation Safety Board said overheating of cells could be expected (THAT IS JUST NORMAL) and they were confident the plane maker’s fix would work as intended. (THE WORD “CONFIDENT” AND “DREAMLINER” DO NOT GO TOGETHER)

The JTSB was not notified (WHY WOULD THEY BE?) of the failure on Qatar Airways according to JTSB’s Mamoru Takahashi, who added that Boeing was not obligated (NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS) to report it. Japan Airlines, All Nippon Airways and Qatar are three of the largest operators of Dreamliners (MY CONDOLENCES) Since putting 22 of the modified 787s into service, Qatar’s Al Baker has expressed confidence (THERE IS THAT WORD AGAIN) in Boeing and in the battery fix.

Experts are concerned (NON EXPERTS ARE CONCERNED TOO)

Jeff Dahn, a physics professor at Dalhousie University and a battery expert, says this issue should not be ignored (SURE IT SHOULD) because it means something is wrong with the cells. (DON’T BE DRAMATIC….) “Normally they will do nothing unless they are being mechanically abused or electrically abused. Since they are in the box, they are probably not being mechanically abused, so there is something going on with those cells.”(IGNORE IT)

Another battery expert who asked not to be identified (SCARED OF BOEING) said he, too, was surprised by the frequency of the problem, considering how few of these cells are in service, 16 per aeroplane on about 300 787s flying. “One out of a thousand sounds high.(IGNORE IT) I would categorise it as a supplier quality control problem (YAY OUTSOURCING) first. It has a safety component but they are managing it by the redesign,” he said.
Dahn used the new Tesla electric car models, each of which has 7000 cells, as a point of comparison. “Why would you continue to use lithium-ion cells that are having trouble?” Dahn asked about Boeing. “Look at the Teslas driving around. They not having problems and there’s a gazillion of them.”

http://www.gizmodo.com.au/2015/10/faa-is-doing-nothing-about-continued-boeing-dreamliner-battery-failures/